I Feel Trapped. Please help?

I feel desperately alone, but I find it very difficult to be around other people. I am untrustworthy and prone to dishonesty, and I would rather be alone as I find that I am incompatible with many people and I would rather be without them. I feel as though there are few people who truly understand; those that do are so far away and we are unlikely to ever cross paths. A psychiatrist does not understand, they only know what they have studied, but have not experienced it themselves - I have had many psychiatrists but have always ended up quitting due to my introverted nature getting in the way of progress. I have been offered antidepressants before also. I have an obsession with food that leads me to being both anorexic and a binge eater. This has been in my life since I was eight years old. I feel dissent at the current government in the UK and the education system, which leads me to believe in a nihilistic sense that there is no hope for me. I feel that I cannot go anywhere or do anything - I am very free-spirited and I just want to be able to live my life without restraints, which I find a difficult prospect. My depression makes me unmotivated and idle. I miss a lot of school, give up on things before I have begun them and procrastinate to the point where I can do nothing else. I am such a perfectionist that I often do not even bother beginning things because I know that they will never be 'perfect'. Please, how can I get out of this rut and stop entrapping myself? I am not ready to get help for my anorexia at the moment. I have not been hospitalised before but it has been threatened. I just want to be able to do the things that I want to do in life and be inspired. Thank you.